At her grandmother's funeral in Japan, author Ruth Ozeki explains another Japanese custom called "honewake" or "dividing the bones, which is often practiced when a person’s family lives in different places." On her returned to the US from Japan, she brought with her some bones of her grandmother, which she was to deliver to her mother. The experience inspired her to film a documentary called "Halving the Bones."
Ozeki R. L. (2008). The Art of Losing: On Writing, Dying, & Mom. Shambhala Sun Magazine.
In her book, "If I am Missing or Dead", author Janine Latus describes the ash scattering memorials held for her sister Amy. One is held at an outdoor chapel at a Michigan youth camp the Latus family attended as children. There they spoke about her favorite things, sang songs, and then spread her ashes into the cattails. (Her mother and father "had divvied up the ashes". Her father buried his share at a Catholic cemetery.) The next day the family drove to Lake Michigan, another favorite spot of Amy's, where the family held their third memorial for her. Each family member walked into the water waist deep, took a handful of ashes, and let them fall into the water, before they released all the remaining ashes. The family then played some of Amy's favorite games on in the water and flew kites in her memory.
Latus, J. (2007). If I Am Missing Or Dead. Simon & Schuster. New York, NY.
Dewey Readmore Books, (1987-2008), the library cat of Spencer, Iowa for 19 years, " was cremated with one of his favorite toys, Mary Mouse, so he wouldn't be alone." His ashes were buried outside "the window of the children's library, at the foot of the beautiful status of a mother reading a book to her child."
Myron, V. (2008). Dewey the Small-Town Libary Cat Who Touched the World. Grand Central Publishing. New York, NY.
Tori Spelling’s Companion: Mimi La Rue (1998-2008)
"Mimi’s memorial service took place at a Zen tea garden in West Hollywood…Mimi’s signature color was pink, so everybody came to the memorial dressed in pink. There were passed hor d’oeuvres – deviled eggs because they were her [Mimi's] favorite – as well as pink cocktails and pink flowers on the tables."
"After about half an hour of cocktails, everyone gathered to watch a video tribute on a big screen. There was footage from her appearances on our show and still shots – Mimi on the lawn of our bed and breakfast; Mimi in my lap; Mimi lying on my pregnant belly; Mimi in a dress with boots – all set to music…"
Next Tori’s husband, Dean, read a letter from the head of an animal rescue organization that Mimi had attended events for. In conjunction with that same charity, Tori and her family established "the Mimi La Rue Fund for sick and injured animals…There were ‘puggybanks’ on all the tables where people could make donations."
Following this, they read a "poem called ‘Rainbow Bridge’ about the doggy afterlife." Then a friend "came forward and asked everyone to lift a glass of pink champagne" and made a toast to Mimi.
"Everyone was handed a little pink box." A speaker read some special passages then “asked everyone to open their boxes. Inside each was a monarch butterfly. We released them and they all flew into the sky...I said my last good-byes and kissed her. I closed the casket and they took her away to cremate her."
Spelling, T. & Liftin H. (2009). Mommywood. (pp. 111-116). New York, NY: Simon Spotlight Entertainment.
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